Relationship cake, crumbles and cherry

Courtesy of IMP

Even the best relationship one day starts to loose its passion and starts to be heart-tearing routine. There are people who like known and safe things, situations,  answers before questions, vacations the same time of a year and at the same spot on Earth with the same company. They enjoy driving the same road to the office and can do it with closed eyes.
Everything is still amazing for them because it’s predictable.
It’s like a cake of relationship you eat daily.

Other people tend to experience something new every day: they are in love with the cities they never been and people they haven’t met yet. They taste new food and talk to strangers, they explore and try.
They are attracted by unpredictable. They know where they are now, but at the same time they like a feeling of unknown next step.  New things makes them excited and  they are happy to return to routine after. Excitement they got elsewhere floats their daily life boat. Every day they  look for a horizon line even covered with clouds.
I like new things. It’s scary sometimes, but excitement takes over – you never know how it will end before it happens to you.
Chit-chat or flirt, random touch, dance or smoking outside with a stranger can change your life. Extremely or a bit.
ONS excitement  is about the same  –  you don’t know what to expect.  You have a belief that you can stop at any time, but willingness to know the next step, to see what you can’t predict  makes it extremely exciting. Especially  in comparison with less surprising life you live everyday.
It’s like a cherry on the cake.

 

Cake crumbles is another story.  When I was 20 years old student, I was hitchhiking. I was going to my internship place in between capital and my parents town.  And one car stopped after half an hour…  The driver was quiet old, as I realized then ( 38 years old guys are  young I would say now). He was going to visit friends at the farm in the forest.  So we had a nice chat and we went to see his friend, then went to the woods to  gather mushrooms, and then we had some coffee and talks. And that’s how 6 years long story started. We were seeing each other at times, he was just after the divorce, and then later he married again, got 2 boys and was living his life and eating his cake.    I was getting just cake crumbles – the time he was stealing from his family. Ocationally.

I was fed up with these crumbles  for quite long time after the story ended. But then the memories about choky crumbles faded away.  So stepped into similar relationship – shorter one, intellectually nice, with much respect and other things, but I  stopped it at the right time.
But I am not ashamed of my choices and my decisions. It’s my past – with marriage cake,  stolen crumbles  of other people’s cakes and some cherries – sweet, sour or wild.  And my past shaped me as I am now. I can’t change my past.  I don’t want to change myself to be liked more.  I am happy to be myself and hope right people will love  the real me…

Man with a Plan ( You will meet him more often here tagged  – you will be able to make the whole puzzle complete from details…It’s amazing material for book to write) says to me:

– My intention and my goal is clear. I want to be your cake, but time to time we will take care about cherry too…
Yes, I am happy, my face brightens up with left side asymmetric smile. I don’t want crumbles, would rather choose the cake and occasional cherry:)
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